Rockingham Remembered
Short Stories
Idiots
Everywhere!
IDIOTS AT WORK:

I was signing the receipt for my credit card
purchase when the clerk noticed I had never
signed my name on the back of the credit card.
She informed me that she could not complete the
transaction unless the card was signed. When I
asked why, she explained that it was necessary to
compare the signature I had just signed on the
receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her.
She carefully compared the signature to the one I
had just signed on the receipt. As luck would have
it, they matched.

IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new
neighbor call the local township administrative
office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing
sign on our road. The reason: too many deer were
being hit by cars and he didn't want them to cross
there anymore.

IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered
a taco. She asked the person behind the counter
for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but
they only had iceberg.

IDIOT SIGHTING #1:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when
an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put
anything in your baggage without your
knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without
my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled
knowingly and added, "That's why we ask."

IDIOT SIGHTING #2:

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe
to cross the street. I was crossing with a coworker
of mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer
was for. I explained that it signals blind people
when the light is red. Appalled, she responded,
"What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"

IDIOT SIGHTING #3:

At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear
coworker who was leaving the company due to
"down sizing," our manager commented
cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more
often." Not a word was spoken. We all just looked
at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights
stare.

IDIOT SIGHTING #4:

I work with an individual who plugged her power
strip back into itself and for the life of her couldn't
understand why her system would not turn on.

IDIOT SIGHTING #5:

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the
keys had been locked in it. We went to the service
department and found a mechanic working
feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I
watched from the passenger side, I instinctively
tried the door handle and discovered that it was
unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician,
"It's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I
already got that side."