Rockingham Remembered
Short Stories II
How Things Have Changed
Funny how things have changed since I was
young!!!!

My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs and spread
mayo on the same cutting board with the same
knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem to get
food poisoning.

My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the  counter
AND I used to eat it raw sometimes too, our
school sandwiches were wrapped in wax paper in a
brown paper bag not in icepack coolers, but I
can't remember getting E coli?

Almost all of us would have rather gone swimming
in the lake instead of a pristine pool (talk
about boring), no beach closures then.

The term cell phone would have conjured up a
phone in a jail cell, and a pager was the school
PA system.

We all took gym, not PE... and risked  permanent
injury with a pair of high top Ked's (only worn
in gym)instead of having cross-training athletic
shoes with air cushion soles and built in light
reflectors. I can't recall any injuries but they
must have happened because they tell us how much
safer we are now.

Flunking gym was not an option...even for stupid
kids! I guess PE must be much harder than gym.

Speaking of school, we all said prayers and sang
the national anthem and staying in detention
after school caught all sorts of negative
attention.

What an archaic health system we had then.
Remember school nurses? Ours wore a hat and
everything.

I thought that I was supposed to accomplish
something before I was allowed to be proud of
myself.

I just can't recall how bored we were  without
computers, Play Station, Nintendo, X-box or 270
digital TV cable stations.

Oh yeah... and where was the Benadryl and
sterilization kit when I got that bee sting?   I
could have been killed!

We played king of the hill on piles of gravel
left on vacant construction sites and when we got
hurt, Mom pulled out the 48 cent bottle of
Mercurochrome (kids liked it better because it
didn't sting like iodine did) and then we got our
butt spanked. Now it's a trip to the emergency
room, followed by a 10-day dose of a $49 bottle
of antibiotics and then Mom calls the attorney to
sue the contractor for leaving a horribly vicious
pile of gravel where it was such a threat.

We didn't act up at the neighbor's house either
because if we did, we got our butt spanked
(physical abuse) here too and then we got butt
spanked again when we got home. I recall the kid
from next door coming over and doing his tricks
on the front stoop just  before he fell off.
Little did his Mom know that she could have owned
our house? Instead she picked him up and swatted
him for being such a goof.

It was a neighborhood run amuck.

To top it off, not a single person I knew had
ever been told that they were from a
dysfunctional family. How could we possibly have
known that?

We needed to get into group therapy and anger
management classes? We were obviously so duped by
so many societal ills, that we didn't even  
notice that the entire country wasn't taking
Prozac!

How did we ever survive?